Category Archives: With Friends

In Which Phoebe Learns How To Climb A Tree

15 Tuesday Nov 2011

Posted by in Learnin', With Friends

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This morning I thought, innocently, “Why am I having a hard time lifting my arms?”

A good portion of the day passed before I realized the answer: on Sunday I’d climbed a tree using ropes and various clamps and tools I can’t name. I’m not even sure how high the tree was. I hadn’t intended to be in it, but I’d tagged along with my partner and a few friends following our weekly coffee hour at City Feed and Supply. One thing led to another, and I found myself following the instructions of our friend Andrew, a self-taught naturalist and long-time recreational climber, inching my way up a stately white oak.

tree-climbers

Back during summer, I’d similarly found myself doing something curious with Andrew and friends: spying on a collection of bee hives at the Boston Nature Center in Mattapan from a safe distance –until that distance was no longer safe and we had to run away! And then we respectfully chased some wild turkeys at a nearby community garden.

Here we see Adam turkey-stalk

It does not escape my notice that I continually, accidentally enjoy the types of adventure that many people pay good money for, and I do it for free. Or, more accurately, I do it for the price of my own curiosity and willingness to give things a try, my drive towards meaningful connection, my interest in feeding care into the relationships that support my partner. For this gift, I’ll gladly bear the sore shoulder or two.

Whole Heart Vermont

13 Thursday Oct 2011

Posted by in Green Life, With Friends

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Over Columbus Day weekend, I had the opportunity to either travel down to New Jersey with my partner, or camp in Southern Vermont with friends.

I enjoy car rides with my partner because they provide a rich opportunity to catch up, to connect.  As both our families are settled on the Jersey Shore, I considered traveling to the city (NYC) with my mother to explore the MOMA, an activity planned as part of my 101 Things in 1001 Days project.

And then Vermont.  The friends I was to accompany are somewhat new in my life –sweet, bright-eyed, earnest world-savers.  The weekend included sleeping in a tent (I’m a bed/indoor plumbing sort), apple-picking (to which I look forward to every year), and other outdoor activities.  It was a risk.  Would I have fun?  Was it fair to attend while my partner pried shingles off his parent’s roof in the hot sun?  What would I eat?

Somehow, somewhere in me bubbled up my old resolve that, if intimidated, all the reason to rush in.  I called on the girl I’ve long appreciated for her tenacity and resourcefulness.  The girl who says oops! and then laughs.

So glad I did.

Gift Circle

03 Monday Oct 2011

Posted by in Green Life, Skillshare, With Friends

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We sit on the grass in the yard, our feet together, dinner a recent memory and frozen desert churning in the house. Trees above contemplate what to wear for fall and the mosquitoes dance down from short heights, not at all confused in their purpose. Over in the next yard, a man mows his lawn and sings. We smile at him and at one another. We listen.

This is the story of a gift circle taking place behind a house on a hill in Jamaica Plain. As one experienced in community building, in time banking, with some years of co-counseling and some hours of non-violent communication, as a true believer in invaluable intangibles, I’m not a stranger to the concept that all individuals have something valuable to contribute to their community. Yet, I remained receptive to surprise, excited to embark on a new path to connecting to the people in my community, friends and strangers and loves.

What are your needs? What are your gifts? What is your intention?

Following the format of the exercise, each person in turn answered whatever was true and pressing (and comfortable to share) to her or him, however concrete or abstract. Sometimes we called out agreement, sometimes we laughed or snapped our fingers to indicate that a need described was one we could happily fill. When the night grew late, we collected ourselves, each gifted with a new opportunity to give or receive.

Then we ate ice cream.

My needs shared that evening:

  • A clever way to wash a multitude of sweaters (my partner’s and mine) by hand
  • Help turning out the compost bin I share with my neighbor

Needs I hadn’t yet put to words:

  • Film camera lessons
  • New bike
  • Creative budgeting advice
  • Cat and plant sitting

My gifts:

  • Editing with a careful ear to the writer’s voice
  • Listening
  • Being fearless and yet polite
  • Being a companion for activities, even the potentially mundane
  • Organizing and planning

(Photo courtesy Ashley Clements 2011)

Middlesex Fells Hike

21 Wednesday Sep 2011

Posted by in Boston Moments, With Friends

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This weekend, my partner, a good friend, her dog, and I hiked the Skyline Trail in the Middlesex Fells, a hidden gem of the Greater Boston area.  I hadn’t heard of this park until just a few years ago, and have been just twice.

Sometimes the Fells revealed its level of use in sparkling patches of broken bottles and tell-tale signs of a campfire, but mostly this urban forest turned a friendly face towards us -clearly marked paths, large rocks to scramble up, plush carpets of moss and lichen, and more than a few fellow hikers accompanied by a wide assortment of dogs.

001Our company of four enjoyed the fair notes of summer transitioning towards fall, picked our way around a number of downed trees (victims of August’s hurricane Irene), and proceeded to find ourselves on and off the trail at various points.  Our three-hour hike turned into something like six.

013Some complaints were heard, creaky knees and stubbed toes felt, slight thirst and hunger, tired dog tail swinging at the sight of a smile or worried look.  I’d like to think we all took the misadventure of our adventure in stride.  I’d like to feel we grew to know one another just a tad bit better.

Jesse James (dog) and shadows